#140) The MJ Hegar Political Video: Democrats Like Non-Narrative Structure

I’m definitely cheering for Texas political candidate MJ Hegar, but her new video is not “a masterpiece of storytelling.”  Sorry.   Warning, this particular blogpost is not for blind worshippers of the Democratic party — it’s for people who want to improve the success of the party.  It’s not for people who felt Al Gore’s movie was a masterpiece.  This is for people who want to learn something about how narrative/story structure does and does not work.  The viral video by Texas political candidate MJ Hegar was forwarded to me last week by five people — all basically saying the same thing — “This is a masterpiece of storytelling … RIGHT?”  Sorry, but it’s not.  It’s an example of reasonably good “singularity of metaphor” and non-narrative structure, but not overall storytelling.  Which doesn’t mean it’s not a good piece of media — it’s just not a masterpiece.  Understanding why is a useful exercise.

DOOR TO DOOR SERVICE:  A fun video, but missing a clear over-arching narrative.



Great video, lots of fun, and strong because it has a singular visual metaphor of “doors” that it repeats.  If you read the bestselling 2012 book,“The One Thing,” you’ll appreciate the importance of having your content be about one thing.  So it’s singular in those terms.

But …

What’s the core narrative?

–  Discrimination against women?

–  The fight against corrupt politics?

–  The need to defeat Tea Party candidates?

If it’s about the need for more women candidates, then it should have begun by addressing that issue — why it’s important to have plenty of women politicians, what the consequences are of not having enough women politicians, how bad the problem is today.

Or if it’s about corrupt politicians, it should have begun with that — how bad things are today, how much money is lost due to corruption, how many scandals have plagued politics lately.

Once the problem is established, then it would be time to lead us on an (ideally emotional) journey to the solution, meaning this political candidate.



Don’t take my word on this stuff — read the powerful and short articles by Nicholas Kristof (“Nicholas Kristof Saves the World” in Outside Magazine in 2009) and Dave Gold (“Data Driven Campaigns are Killing the Democratic Party” in Politico last year).

Nicholas Kristof tells you about the cost of changing a story about one little girl suffering in a village to just two little girls.  Just that tiny change — going from the singular to the dual — which you’d think would make it more compelling because there’s more people involved — actually dilutes the narrative, making it weaker.

Dave Gold offers up the simple metaphor of a Christmas tree as the central narrative with everything else being ornaments.  These elements are where the Hegar video does not have a good grasp on narrative structure.

It could have been built around the question of, “How are we going to get women through THE DOOR of the Capitol building?”  or could have posed the question of, “How are we going to throw corrupt politicians out THE DOOR of the Capitol Building?”  One or the other.  And THEN, after setting up the question in the context of “a door,” it could have cut to the helicopter door with her saying, “I know a few things about doors …”



For over a decade I’ve tried to explain (with endless apologies) how the 2006 documentary, An Inconvenient Truth,” did not tell “a good story” and thus, in the long run, was not the piece of persuasive media that the climate movement needed.  I did it in all three of my books.

Most of my words fell on deaf ears.  If you don’t understand story structure, you’re not going to understand a critique based on story structure.  But the sad bottom line is that almost nobody wants to watch that movie today, a decade later — it didn’t stand the test of time (and the 2.0 version in 2016 flopped).

Neither Gore’s movie nor Hegar’s political video lay out a clear three act-structured problem/solution dynamic to take us on a journey of exploration/solution.  Both are focused, first and foremost, on the person, rather than the issue.

In the end, both are very impressive resumes of accomplishments, but a resume is rarely a story — it’s more like a laundry list — which is NON-NARRATIVE (as defined by the neuroscientists Sanford and Emmott in their 2013 book, “Mind, Brain and Narrative”).

Effective use of narrative structure is all about context — meaning set up — meaning the AND part of the ABT triad.  Starting with the helicopter door is certainly attention grabbing, but you’ve skipped the set up and thus the context.



This is such a common mistake of Democrats/the left wing/the highly educated.  It’s the mistake of starting with the solution, which is what this video does.  Before it gives us a chance to connect with a serious problem for which Ms Hegar is the solution, it begins with the solution — Ms Hegar.  It opens by presenting a series of her accomplishments (combat heroism, surviving domestic abuse, professional accomplishments, overcoming gender discrimination) before it identifies the problem that everyone can agree upon.

I’ve watched this happen for decades with the environmental movement — smart people, deep in their fox holes coming up with brilliant solutions that they present to an audience that they just assume knows what the problem is.  I gave an entire talk on it in 2010 titled, “Dude, Where’s My Climate Movement” for the WWF 50th Anniversary that a lot of people didn’t appreciate.

It’s exactly what the climate movement did, post-Gore movie, by presenting their cap and trade solution to climate change to a country that did not yet feel there was a problem worth acting on.  Hundreds of millions of dollars were squandered on that failed effort (as itemized bravely by Matt Nisbet in his “Climate Shift” report), which I view as primarily a failure to grasp the narrative dynamics at work.

In the end, this stuff is ALL about the problem/solution divide.  Tell us the problem in simple terms, then offer up your solution — namely the candidate.  That’s not the structure of this video.

Which means in the end, it’s a fun piece of “preaching to the choir” — just as Al Gore’s movie was good for uniting everyone on the same team.  But don’t confuse it with the eternal and boundless power of storytelling.  Telling an engaging story has the ability to tap into irrational forces that can override logic.  This video is a great presentation of an amazing resume, but it’s largely non-narrative and thus not a great piece of storytelling.



If you want to get more technical about it, below is my ABT analysis of the script of the video.  Take a look at the color coding.  You can see 7 ABT cycles.

1ST ABT –  Combat door
2ND ABT – Domestic abuse
3RD ABT – Military gender discrimination 1
4TH ABT – Military gender discrimination 2
5TH ABT – Military gender discrimination 3
6TH ABT –  Crooked politics
7TH ABT –  Republicans must go

These “narrative loops” are why it feels like good storytelling.  And it is on the fine scale.  But on the larger scale, which is essential for long term impact, it’s lacking the overall clear and singular ABT structure.

In contrast, look at the amazing speech Oprah gave earlier this year at the Golden Globes.  The NY Times called it “a story about stories.” And there’s your difference.

Oprah’s speech was “a story of stories,” Hager’s video is “a list of stories.”  

Oprah’s over-arching ABT was clear and simple — that women and minorities are on a journey BUT have not yet reached the designation, THEREFORE we must keep at it.  It was the same ABT as Martin Luther King’s “I Have A Dream” speech.  Both of them used their first paragraph to lay out the over-arching ABT.

Hager opened with the helicopter door, basically cutting right to the chase.  Plus there was never any clear interpretation of the combat experience — anything like, “nearly losing my life that day caused me to realize women are willing to make the same risk for their country — their lives — as men, yet are not given equal treatment by the country.”  That could have been the over-arching ABT that connects with the combat experience, but it wasn’t in there.

So I don’t want to diminish the power of the video — it’s already scored well over a million views on Youtube (unfortunately, too late to be in Joe Romm’s great new book on “How to Go Viral”) and is far better than most political ads, but when Daily Kos says it might be “THE BEST we’ve ever seen” they’re just showing a lack of understanding of narrative structure.

And that’s been the Achilles Heel of the Democratic party for a long time now.



To see the narrative structure more clearly, here’s the entire script of the Hegar video, assigning each piece to the three fundamental forces of narrative:


“This is a story about doors — a lot of them — and that’s me, I’m Jane Hegar — an air force combat veteran and a mom — this door behind me is from my helicopter, and all that’s left of the aircraft I was flying that day.

I was on a rescue mission in Afghanistan as a combat search and rescue pilot I heard the windshield crack and realized I’d been shotbut continued the mission and airlifted the patients out.  After taking even more fire, we crashed a few miles away.

But my story begins much earlier.  One of my first childhood memories was of a door, but it was my dad, throwing my mom through a glass door.Three years later, mom got the courage to walk out the door, and she opened a new one for my sister and me, here in Texas.  And it was here that I put my foot on the gas and followed my dream to be a pilot And that meant opening, pushing — sometimes kicking through every door that was in my way.

I signed up for ROTC at U.T., and then I was commissioned as an officer in the air force.  I served five years in aircraft maintenance, working on the F-16 and the B-2.  I managed to get one of only a handful of slots for flight school, then I spent a year training to fly.  I flew water drops over wildfires in California, and eventually served three tours in Afghanistan.  And then, the crash.

Two army helicopters rescued us from the wreckage.  I strapped myself to the skids and returned fire on the Taliban, while we flew to safety.  That got me a purple heart, and I became only the second woman awarded the distinguished flying cross with valor.

But after that, the door closed.  Injured and unable to fly, I was barred from my next career choice because I was a woman.  So I came home.  Iworked in healthcare and business.  I got married and started my family.    WAIT — barred because I was a woman?   That’s ridiculous.  SO (THEREFORE) I sued the Pentagon — not just about that job — about the ban on women serving in all ground combat jobs

AND I went to DC to lobby congressBUT door after door was slammed in my face — I heard things like, “My boss agree with you, but you aren’t in a position to do anything for him,” “You’re not one of our donors,” — (implied BUT I kept working)  THEREFORE:  well, eventually —

PANETTA CLIP:  We are eliminating the direct combat exclusion rule for women”

We won, and that opened the door for hundreds of thousands of women to compete for elite ground combat jobs — a major victory for our military.

Hold on — back up a minute — not one of his donors?  That’s not how this is supposed to work.

One of those closed doors was my congressman, Tea Party Republican John Carter — apparently being one of his constituents and a veteran wasn’t enough to get a meeting — I guess I also needed to be a donor — SO (THEREFORE) now I’m running against him — taking on a system that cares more about campaign donors and political parties than protecting our country.

Congressman Carter hasn’t had a tough race his whole career, SO — “  “We’ll show him tough, then we’ll show him the door.

#139) Power of the Singular Narrative: Ornithologist Filardi Pays the Price

American cats kill 4 billion birds a year, yet an ornithologist, in his scientific research to preserve a species, kills one tropical bird that’s less than a thousandth of its population and people want blood.  The singular narrative is a great thing when the mob goes after the killer of Cecil the Lion, but not so great when they turn their focus on a well meaning scientist.




Yesterday the NY Times had a rather sad story about the level of internet vigilante-ism seen these days thanks to social media.  It was about ornithologist Christopher Filardi who did what field biologists have done for centuries — he “collected” a specimen.

But by the time he had come down from the mountains, the AMNH had innocently tweeted out a photo of the “sacrificed” bird (always loved how that word was used in scientific methods), mentioning he had killed it in the name of science.  That was all it took to unleash the fury of the internet.  He ended up the target of something similar to the Michigan dentist who killed Cecil the Lion (not in the name of science).



There’s a whole discussion to be had about whether nature should be killed in the name of science any more, but what interests me is the power and drama of the clean, singular narrative.  It’s fascinating because science loves big numbers and large data sets.

And yet, as Nicholas Kristof pointed out in his brilliantly concise 2009 article in “Outside” magazine (that I have used for years in workshops) storytelling is at its strongest when there’s just a single character — especially when it comes to the villain.

The Filardi article pointed out the millions of birds killed by millions of faceless villains (domestic cats) and nearly a billion birds crash into buildings each year.  But all those numbers are meaningless up against the drama of the one seemingly oblivious scientist slaughtering nature with apparently no concerns for the creatures themselves.

It might be hard to process, but had the bird been killed by a team of five biologists the rage wouldn’t have been as powerful as it was for just the one poor nature loving scientist.  And this ends up being one of the toughest challenges for science-minded people when it comes to communication — the idea that more is not more when it comes to drama — it’s less.

#138) AUDIO: A Great Discussion of Story Circles Narrative Training with Government Agencies

Want to hear from a few graduates of Story Circles Narrative Training?  On Monday we held an hour conference call with folks from three government agencies — all graduates of Story Circles.  They range from a scientist (Mike Strauss, formerly of USDA) to a communicator with a science background (Michael Bart of National Park Service) to a communicator with no science background (Heidi Koontz of USGS).  It’s an insightful discussion.  And gratifying.

WARNING:  There’s a bunch of beeps at the start from people joining the call, but they stop after a few minutes.



On Monday the USFWS folks in Portland hosted this conference call in preparation for the Demo Day we’ll be doing with them this fall.  I moderated the discussion involving three veterans of Story Circles as a large group listened in.  Each of them spoke for 10 minutes, providing specifics on how Story Circles has worked at their agencies.

Of particular note is Heidi Koontz of USGS in Ft Collins, Colorado.  She’s a communicator, not a scientist, and head of communication for the Central States Region.   She tells of how, as a long time veteran communicator, she wondered if the training might be superfluous — that she already knows it all from her years of experience.  She says it proved hugely valuable.

I’ve had Heidi speak at several of our Demo Days because of this.  She tells of how the other four members of her circle were scientists, causing her to groan at first.  But by the end, the four scientists had become such a valuable resource for her that she now uses them constantly for editorial input as they now have a language in common — the language of the ABT Framework.

It’s a great discussion.

#137) Bernie Sanders Makes Clear Why the Democrats are Doomed

My heart is with Bernie Sanders, but my head says he (and the Democratic party) are doomed.  When asked on Friday evening on HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher about “the message” of the Democratic party he didn’t have a good answer.  Until they figure out how narrative works, they are doomed.




Trump knows narrative.  That was the title of my draft editorial that the publicist for my Houston, We Have A Narrative book submitted to a large number of newspapers in the fall of 2015 as everyone was busy laughing at Donald Trump.  It was turned down everywhere — they already knew Trump didn’t stand a chance at the presidency.  I was left telling about the Trump/Narrative theme the morning after the election on “The Business of Story” podcast.

Two weeks ago on “Meet the Press” (May 27), Chuck Todd said, “… as President Trump showed once again how skilled he is at shaping a false narrative to his advantage.”  He’s talking about “shaping narrative.”  That’s what Trump knows how to do.  And the Democrats don’t.

What can be said about this?  The Democrats are utterly, utterly inept at mass messaging, which means narrative.  Here’s yet another article, just last week, with the same old headline of the Democrats, “need to have a message.”  Over and over and over again it’s being said to them.

My Democratic strategist friend Dave Gold had an excellent article in Politico last year laying it out clear as day — that Democrats are too much in love with polls and data, and too clueless about story/narrative.

It’s now at crisis stage.



Hillary’s campaign, sadly, showed that they were both inept at messaging and uninterested in working on it.  The former was displayed by the candidate herself on May 22, 2016 with this exchange on Meet the Press:

CHUCK TODD:  Bernie Sanders has been talking about a political revolution. A future you can believe in. Obviously, Donald Trump with the Make America Great again, is one of these slogans that has taken off, for better or for worse. If you could sum up, what is the big idea of your candidacy?

SEC. HILLARY CLINTON:  Look, we are stronger together. We are stronger together, in facing our internal challenges and our external ones. We are stronger together if we work to improve the economy. And that’s going to mean trying to get the Republicans to do what will actually help produce more jobs, like we saw in the 1990s. We are stronger together when we have a bipartisan, even nonpartisan foreign policy that protects our country. And that provides a kind of steady, strong, smart leadership that the rest of the world expects from us.

I ended up seeing for myself how disinterested in messaging the Clinton campaign folks were when James Carville pulled all his strings (which were plenty) to try and get them to at least try working with my ABT Narrative Template, which I told about last year here.  

That was sad, but Bernie is no better.



Look at this exchange last Friday evening.  Bill Maher asked Bernie VERBATIM for “something that would fit on a hat.”  Why couldn’t he answer him with a 4 word slogan?  Donald Trump would have.

BILL MAHER:  … BUT an agenda is not a message.  They are different.  Trump is better at messaging.  His voters don’t care about an agenda except build a wall, lock her up.  What’s the Democrats message?  If you had to boil it down to something that would fit on a hat, which is about all that people can take in at this point — what’s the Democrat’s message?

BERNIE SANDERS:   The Democrat’s message is that we need a government that represents working families not billionaires.  (APPLAUSE)   An agenda that says health care is a right not a privilege.  An agenda that speaks to the young people that says that we should make colleges and universities tuition free and lower debt.

Where was the slogan that fits on a hat?  This is not silliness. Every facet of this country is now suffering the consequences of Donald Trump’s narrative skills.   How bad does it have to get until the Democrats admit they have a fundamental problem with narrative in today’s information-glutted world?

Look at this quote from last week:  Don Baer, White House Communications Director for President Bill Clinton, used to say that Democrats were really good at “coming up with 100 reasons to do something…but never just one.”

There’s your problem.  It’s called “the singular narrative.”  Trump eats it for breakfast as Democrats continue to argue back, “Well, it’s not that simple.”  Yes, it has to be, or there’s no hope for you.



Last week Dr. Tullio Rossi of Australia posted this wonderful cartoon version of my ABT Narrative Template which so far has gotten several hundred retweets on Twitter.

It’s all so sad when looked at in terms of the presidential election.  Plain as day — Hillary was the left column in this graphic, Trump was the right column.  I showed it quantitatively over and over again using the ABT Framework.  I tried to show during the campaign how Hillary’s speeches were overflowing with the word “AND.”

The rest is Trumpian history.  Yes, it continues to be that simple.  This is a battle that the over-educated are simply not equipped to handle.  I started warning of this problem in 2009 with the first edition of, “Don’t Be Such A Scientist: Talking Substance in an Age of Style.”  It’s incredibly frustrating to watch them continue to spin so aimlessly.  And with no signs of change ahead.

The Democrats are doomed.

#136) Complexity Kills: How to Over-Complicate the Teaching of Story

Last week my good friend Park Howell, host of the popular podcast, The Business of Story” presented an excellent webinar titled, “Your So-called Storytelling is Killing Your Brand.”  I have talked for years about the stampede of well intentioned zealots for “the power of storytelling” who appear to have minimal ability to actually tell a story, yet dazzle audiences by presenting the complexity of story analysis drawn from books about story structure.  I like to think of it as trying to teach football to little league players using the playbook of the New England Patriots.  You can do it, all the parents will brag about how their kid is using such a sophisticated playbook, but is it really going to work if the kids don’t even know how to throw a decent pass or kick the ball properly?  This really needs to stop.  Please, start with the ABT before you dive into all the exciting complex stuff.  It’s what we do in Story Circles Narrative Training.  Start with the simple.  You need to build INTUITION first. 

THIS FEEDS STORYPHOBIA.  The top diagram shows something called “story spirals.”  Why?  There’s already enough scientists who are suspicious and dismissive of story dynamics in science without confusing them with excessive complexity.  The ABT is the simple pathway to gaining an initial understanding of the narrative underpinnings of science and drama.  Start with the simple.  Please.



I’m sorry to have to single out one person, but a specific example is needed to make this point.  I’m sure that Anna Clemens has the best of intentions in writing this essay about telling a story in your scientific paper.  But the problem is you really do confuse and lose a lot of people by diving so quickly into the complexity of “plot spirals” (how have I spent 30 years in and around Hollywood and not once heard this term?).

Narrative is very, very, very challenging.  This is what I learned long ago in film school where I studied with one of the great legends of script structural analysis, Frank Daniel.

We know this well in our Story Circles Narrative Training program.  As a result, we hold off to the end of each hour session for the discussion and implementation of the full story templates of the Story Cycle (as developed by Park Howell, derived from the work of Joseph Campbell, Jonah Sach’s book, Winning the Story Wars” and other sources) and the Logline Maker (as developed by Dorie Barton and presented in our bookConnection, and derived from Blake Snyder’s book, Save the Cat).

Last week Park Howell presented a great webinar in which he told of how in his workshops he uses the ABT as the simple, intuitive, entry point for eventually crafting a more complex narrative using those templates.  Everyone interested in the use of story structure for their communication should listen to his webinar.

All of these people wanting to popularize the use of story dynamics in science communication need to realize it’s best to start with the simple before progressing to the complex.  It’s that simple.  It really is.  We’ve been watching it for 4 years now in the development of Story Circles.  And you can see the strength of it in this approach in the new video we’ve produced with the National Park Service folks in Colorado


THE NATIONAL PARK SERVICE IN COLORADO STORY CIRCLES.  Last week we posted this short video with three of the participants of the 6 concurrent Story Circles recently concluded by the National Park Service staff in Colorado.



Paul Zak (cited in the Clemens article) and his oxytocin storytelling has been discredited by Ed Yong in The Atlantic and ridiculed by John Oliver on his HBO show.  Is there really no consequence for having that happen?

#135) The Colorado National Park Service Story Circles Video

“That one hour that they got together every week was the most enjoyable hour of their work week.”  That’s how Larry Perez, Communications Coordinator for National Park Service in Ft Collins, Colorado, opens this new video about Story Circles.  The video speaks for itself — Story Circles works.

COMMUNICATIONS TRAINING doesn’t have to be boring and dull.

#134) A Glimpse into Story Circles

Story Circles works.  That’s the simple conclusion at this point, 4 years after sketching out the concept at the end of, “Houston, We Have A Narrative.”  We’ve now involved well over 1,000 scientists and communicators. In a few days we’re going to post a short video that shows how successful, popular and valuable the 6 concurrent circles with National Park Service in Colorado were.  For now, have a look at our weekly update that Liz Foote puts together every Monday — it gives a little glimpse into the current level of activity.  We’ve run 27 Demo Days (DD) and 38 Story Circles (SC).  It speaks for itself.

RES IPSA LOQUITUR.  Story Circles speaks for itself

#133) A Major Milestone: The Completion of 6 Story Circles at the National Park Service is the Start of “Narrative Culture”

I dreamed of it at the end of, “Houston, We Have A Narrative.” Now they’ve done it.  Last year the good folks at the National Park Service in Fort Collins, Colorado (and Lakewood!) launched 6 Story Circles involving 32 scientists and communicators.  All 6 went the distance, with the last one completing their 10th session this week. Along the way they established a new tradition — the ABT Cake (or pie!) to celebrate the 10th session along with the completion certificates (important in a government agency). Of course, the training is not finished.  It never is.  Story Circles just orients you with the tools and mindset to start seeing narrative structure better and thinking more deeply about it. This is now a nucleus of 32 people who can speak the ABT Framework among themselves as they shape the narrative structure of all their projects and communication.  It’s a major accomplishment, with huge thanks to Larry Perez, the Communications Coordinator who masterminded the entire effort from start to finish.

THREE CAKES AND A PIE.  These are 4 of the 6 circles, celebrating their 10th and final session with ABT cakes and an ABT pie.



Here is it, in living color.  I started the last chapter of, “Houston, We Have A Narrative” in 2015 talking about the idea of what I termed, “Narrative Culture.”  It’s the concept of a group of co-workers being versed in the ABT Framework and the narrative tools we introduce in Story Circles.  If they all speak this common language of narrative structure, and have practiced the idea of working on someones narrative as a group, using the narrative tools, that they can begin to not only work together, but also set standards where they can spot AAA and DHY problems and work to reduce them. 

Here’s what I said about it:

Having a narrative culture within an organization or university department or research institution could mean you have reached a critical threshold of people who have undergone narrative training, have developed the basics of narrative intuition, and now the norms have shifted. They know the narrative templates. They speak with a shared narrative vocabulary.

 And there is now a certain level of expectation of narrative clarity and cohesion.  It’s not a lot to learn, there’s just a need to learn it well. 

Here’s what Story Circles Narrative Training provides, and why it’s so valuable:


1 THE TOOLS – introduces the participants to the ABT, the Dobzhansky Template, the Story Cycle and the Log Line Maker

2 NARRATIVE INTUITION  it puts them on the pathway towards the ultimate goal of narrative intuition

3 SOCIAL ENTRAINMENT –  it gets everyone in the habit of developing narrative structure as a group, which is essential



With many of the participants there’s a feeling of “That was great — what’s next?”   We’ve gotten that with other circles.  The Fort Collins USGS circle that took part in our AAAS video told about how they wanted to keep meeting after the ten sessions were done.

For now, it’s up to the circles to just meet on their own and view themselves as a resource.  For one previous circle there were four scientists and a communicator.  The communicator now speaks the ABT Framework language with the four scientists and is able to use them as a resource for analysis of press releases and papers.

We’ll eventually develop some sort of Story Circles 2.0.  We were talking about it at USDA three years ago from the start.  For now, the main goal is to just get large numbers of people through the training and let them continue to work and talk among themselves. We’re approaching 50 circles, and if you add up all the scientists and communicators who have taken part in the nearly 30 Demo Days, the total number of people involved is well over 1,000.  

Slowly, slowly, changing the way people look at communications training.  Getting them to realize, “Narrative is Everything.”



Plain and simple, as laid out in this figure on page 220 of “Houston, We Have A Narrative.”

#132) Michelle Wolf’s Narrative Index was a Stunning 47

On Saturday night comedian Michelle Wolf blew the doors off the White House Correspondents Dinner, besting even Stephen Colbert’s famous 2006 performance. Her Narrative Index (But/And ratio) was a sky high 47 — the highest I’ve ever measured.  I’ve been saying this for a while — it’s what you get with comedians — very dense, concise ABT structure.  Bill Maher’s monologues average 33. Imagine what would have happened if Michelle Wolf had been head speech writer for Hillary Clinton.  I’m serious.




Hopefully by now you’ve at least heard about the stunningly hilarious “speech” comedian Michelle Wolf delivered on Saturday night at the White House Correspondents Dinner.

Here’s the ABT Framework analysis. Look at her stats:

       BUT                                                                  21

       AND                                                                  45

       NARRATIVE INDEX                                         47

       AND INDEX                                                      1.8

The Narrative Index is just the ratio of BUTs to ANDs.  I’ve been studying it for three years now.  I’ve calculated it for at least 2,000 speeches.  None has ever scored this high. 

In general, dull speakers (GW Bush) score under 10.  Average speakers are in the teens (Hillary Clinton low teens, Bill Clinton high teens).  Good speakers are in the 20’s (Lincoln, Martin Luther King, Jr.).  Comedians are in the 30’s.  Richard Nixon reached the 40’s with his first inaugural address.

But Michelle Wolf … in addition to lighting the White House Correspondents Dinner on fire (even more than Stephen Colbert’s gutsy performance during the Bush years), she managed to ring the bell like no one ever before.  

These things go hand in hand.  For comedy to work, it has to be tight.  Her comedy was incredibly tight.  The Narrative Index reveals this quantitatively.



I’m so serious about this it’s painful.  How dense can politicians be?  Get yourself a comedian for your writing staff.  NOT to write jokes.  Get a comedian because they have what I termed in “Houston, We Have A Narrative,” the essential quality of “narrative intuition” if they’re any good. 

Comedians get this stuff.  They bore easily.  That’s what you want in order to reach the masses —  someone who is not enthralled by your economic eight point plan.  

Form matters.  If jokes are long, boring or confusing they will destroy the performance.  Comedians understand form at an intuitive level.  Most politicians don’t, but they should.

Just to see how she uses the word “but” to turn so many of her lines, here’s the first five occurrences of it in her speech: 

I never really thought I’d be a comedian, but I did take an aptitude test in 7th grade,

People are saying America is more divided than ever, but I think no matter what you support politically, we can all agree this is a great time for craft stores.

I know there’s a lot of people that want me to talk about Russia and Putin and collusion, but I’m not going to do that because there’s also a lot of liberal media here and I’ve never really wanted to know what any of you look like when you orgasm.

Trump isn’t here, if you haven’t noticed, he’s not here. And I know, I know, I would drag him here myself, but it turns out the president of the United States is the one pussy you’re not allowed to grab.

Now, I know people really want me to go after Trump tonightbut I think we should give the president credit when he deserves it.

#131) Our California Climate Adaptation Podcast Special with UCLA: “A Freight Train of Pain” is Coming

Working with Doug Parsons, host of America Adapts: the Climate Change Podcast, we produced a 3 part series on the issue of climate adaptation for the state of California.  It’s sponsored by UCLA’s Institute of Environment and Sustainability, and features a half dozen of their faculty.  The mood of the piece is light, but the actual contents are pretty dark as 20 experts weigh in with a fairly grim prognosis.  The predictions paint a picture of a state that will increasingly look like Baja for vegetation due to wildfire, has an approaching, “freight train of pain” for the issue of drought, and ultimately will confront “the greatest crisis humanity will ever face,” with sea level rise.  We were hoping for a happier ending.  Oh, well.




Last month Doug Parsons and I produced, “California Adapts” a 3 part special for his podcast, “America Adapts: The Climate Change Podcast,” that takes a close look at the state of California.  Given that most of America now accepts that climate is changing (check out the report released this week from the Yale climate folks arguing this), it’s time to focus more on the question of, “So how are you gonna handle it?”

The podcast opens with Jeff Mount of U.C. Davis doing a powerful job of telling about the great flood of 1861/62 that so devastated Sacramento the capital had to be temporarily moved to San Francisco.  From there, Mary Nichols (long time head of California’s Air Resources Board) and actor/environmentalist Ed Begley, Jr. tell the story of how Los Angeles solved the smog problem of the 1970’s.

These two stories set the stage for the journey Doug takes around the state in the second episode.  We divided the issue of climate adaptation into five main topics — fire, flood, drought, temperature and sea level rise.   For each one he goes out into the field with an expert, then we interview others in search of a clear idea of how prepared the state is for climate change.

In the final episode we go back to a few of the experts to ask them for their bottom line opinion on what the future will look like.  The answers range from somewhat unsettling to very unsettling.  

I have to say, it certainly opened my eyes to how serious the problems are.  One of the most disconcerting bits is when Fire Captain Tony McHale of the Ojai Fire Station talks about the term “career fire” which means a once in a lifetime-sized fire.  He says, “We’ve had two career fires in the past year — what does that say?”

The big problem is infrastructure.  The future is going to need new approaches, and while it’s clear that there are lots of plans and ideas on how to deal with it, what’s not so clear is where the resources are going to come from and when the major actions are going to begin.